This morning, lying in shivasana at the end of yoga, I thought about all I had to be thankful for–my health, my family, the life experience I’ve had to this point, and everything that is going to happen in the next year. Once I finished my gratitude list, I returned to reflecting on the life I’ve experienced up until now and felt even more gratitude for being able to arrive at my Authentic Self, manifest the life that I currently have, and for what I see coming in the future–all of which has been with relatively few lows. I was reminded of my curiosity about whether or not we're all destined to hit the lowest lows to reach the highest highs.

I don’t have any academic research to support this–just experience and observation, but with each passing day, I believe even more that it is possible to discover your Authentic Self without having to have a major breakdown, a tragic event, or experience a major loss. I understand why those events and experiences often lead an individual to connect with their Authentic Self, but I don’t think that’s the only way to arrive there. The lessons learned during these tough times are surrounding us and can be learned in good times, which I think is the key to avoiding prolonged bad times.

Before I go any further, I want to acknowledge that I know it is not possible to completely avoid tragedy, loss, heartache, disappointment, etc. Things will not always go your way. You won’t always get what you want. You will have low moments. I don’t know why some people seem to have more, and others seem to have a smoother path. I’m sure there are numerous reasons, but one possible explanation is that each of our souls is here to learn a specific lesson–I’ve read multiple books that discuss this possibility. I’m not sure I believe it, but I see how it could explain the discrepancies in our lived experiences.

Ok, back to proactively learning lessons…

One way to learn whatever lesson you’re supposed to be learning is through your own life experiences. Life is the greatest teacher, and it will keep teaching the lesson until you learn it. This constant teaching is what sometimes leads us to painful experiences. Life starts out teaching us lessons peacefully and quietly. If we fail to learn the lesson, it teaches a little louder, trying to get our attention, and if we continue to fail to learn the lesson, it continues to get louder. Sometimes we catch the lesson early; sometimes we don’t learn it until later.

So, remember this and be aware and open to the lesson(s) being taught, and hopefully, you can reduce the number of tough lessons you have to experience.

Another way to learn is through the experiences of others. You will not be the first person to learn the lesson that is being taught to you, and it’s through the experiences of others that you can speed up your learning curve. These opportunities are always present. You can find them in books (both fiction and non-fiction), interviews on podcasts/TV/print publications, mentors, and even complete strangers–don’t sleep on the lessons from strangers.

I recently purchased a new cold plunge and spent some time standing in the cold talking to the deliveryman, Jim. He asked me about what it was that he was delivering, and when I shared with him that it was a cold plunge, he asked why I would want one. I explained to him that there are supposedly health benefits to submerging in cold water; I was most interested in the mental aspect of getting into the cold. I hate the cold, and sitting in the cold is an exercise in mental toughness that will only help in other aspects of life. We continued to talk about mental toughness and how I want the boys to get in the plunge in the spring and summer to build up theirs.

I forget exactly how we got there, but he shared that he was 60 years old, making these deliveries each day–after he left my house, he had to deliver six pallets of salt, each weighing over 2500 pounds. I told him he looked great for 60, and that it was impressive he was still out there driving a truck, making heavy deliveries, and doing it in the cold of winter. He smiled at me and said, “Yeah, and I’m doing it on one leg”. He pulled up his pant leg and showed his prosthetic leg.

Jim shared how he had an infection in his foot that continued to return, and after learning that it would be something that would never fully heal and would continue to return, often taking him out of work for weeks at a time, he decided to have the bottom part of his leg amputated. Can you imagine making the decision your Self to have a limb amputated? What strength. What bravery. What perspective. He said that he knew if he could get rid of the infection, he would eventually be able to return to full health, and if amputation was the only way, then that was the path he’d go down.

Once he began his recovery post-surgery, Jim focused on one goal at a time.

First, it was walking again.

Then it was time to get into his new lifted truck.

Then it was riding the motorcycle (a trike) that he bought about a year before.

Then it was getting back to work.

One by one, he checked them all off.

A lesson in overcoming adversity.

A lesson in controlling your perspective and outlook on life.

A lesson in optimism.

A lesson in not giving up.

And these lessons came to me through a conversation with a stranger, someone most people wouldn’t have given the time of day to. I came in and told Ang about Jim, his story, and how I wish I could have recorded our conversation because his story was so inspiring.

I was thankful for the conversation with Jim, and for the lessons he taught me. I don’t know if that conversation will spare me from a harder lesson in the future, but I will always remember it.

These opportunities to learn from others are always present if you’re open to receiving them. And while I can’t prove it, the lessons you learn from others might allow you to learn the life lessons intended for you with less stress, pain, or suffering.

While I can’t promise you that I’m right in my belief that we can proactively move through life open to the lessons from life and create a smoother path for our Selves, I don’t see how paying more attention to the lessons in your life and in the lives of others can be a bad thing.

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See you tomorrow and keep pursuing,

JC